From 2008 until January of this year I had a weekly column in the local newspaper titled Letters From the Doghouse. It was a sort of advice column for dog owners.  I currently am compiling years of said column and my photos of dogs I've trained over the past 31 years into a book I am calling Life in the Doghouse. As I work on the compilation in addition to my current fiction project I plan to share some of the advice I've given dog owners over the years. Feel free to send my blogs to anyone in your life who is a dog lover.

Love Them Enough to Make Them the Best Pets

I believe every puppy is born with the potential to be the best pet you've ever had or the worst nightmare. Each breed of dog has unique personality characteristics. Mixed or designer breeds combine characteristics. It is true some breeds tend to be more or less affectionate, dominant, aggressive, protective, or playful. But, I do not believe there is any one breed that is the best, nor is there one that is the most dangerous.

Since I began training dogs while in college in 1981, and certainly since I began my business in 1988, I have seen dogs of all sizes, breeds, shapes, ages, that were darlings and others that were downright mean.

Puppies are not born aggressive. Some are born with the desire to be the alpha, or leader. Some back down from confrontation quicker than others. But even that is not what makes a dog dangerous.

The most dangerous dog is an untrained dog. Without training, dogs do not learn the humans in their packs are the loving masters. And, at the most basic level, that is the source of a dangerous dog’s behavior. Please note: Saying the humans need to be the masters or the dominant ones NEVER means abuse a dog. And, yes an abused dog is very dangerous. But again, it wasn’t trained, it was mistreated. Training a dog is never abuse.

The best pet you will ever have will be a trained one. Period. Any dog, any size, any age, any breed, or any mix must know its role in the human/dog relationship. Humans must grasp this too. The day you bring your dog home please understand he is your dog, you are not his human.

Training your dog means housebreaking him so he learns self-control. Believe me, for all the wonders those dog litter boxes advertise, they will create huge behavior issues. And smells. And messes. Training him also means teaching some simple obedience commands, teaching him what ‘no’ means, and that he must respect all of the humans with whom he lives humans. Even if the dog essentially belongs to one family member, he must obey everyone his pack.

We are not talking about tricks or agility or games right now. Those are fun to teach and do, but they are not what make the best pet. Mutual respect between you and your dog is imperative. You must respect he is a dog, he will think, feel, and act like a dog. You must love him for that fact alone. And he must respect that you are his master and will always be in charge.

Your dog, whether he’s a puppy, rescue, purebred or mix, deserves the chance to become all he can be. And when you love him enough to teach proper behavior he will be your best pet ever.

I'm sure each of us has at least one person in our lives who has no filters. They say what's on their mind, no matter what it is. At times this can be comical, others frustrating, and sometimes downright disturbing.

I saw a meme recently about three filters that anything I say should go through. Today I want to share my insight on this subject.Whenever I want to speak something, reply to something, and even if I am reacting to something I need to remember to put it through three filters:

1.) Is it true?  This seems like a 'no-brainer' or at least it should be. But sometimes, in the middle of truth there can be an exaggeration, stretch, or even a little untruth. My words, whether written, spoken, or posted somewhere should always pass through the TRUTH filter first.

Once they pass through that filter, then they must be stopped by the second one.

2.)  Is it necessary?  This filter is more fine than the first one. There are things that make it through the truth filter, and, while they are completely true, saying, writing, or reacting to them is not necessary. This filter is a tough one at times. I may try to convince me it is necessary when it's not. I must pray and seek wisdom. Even if I want to say it, if I determine it's not necessary, I mustn't say it. And, if I cannot determine the necessity of the comment, that means it is not necessary.

Once my words pass through this filter and I'm sure they are necessary, there is one more, very fine, very difficult filter to get through.

3.)  Is it kind?  What I want to say or share may be total truth and necessary, but this final filter is imperative. And, when I don't slow down long enough to really use this filter my words may appear without compassion, love, or grace. That means they are without healing.

When I write or speak from my deep emotions, passion, or convictions I can skip right past the kindness filter. There is a right way and a not-so-right way to say, write, post, or do things. The Is it kind? filter is the most fine and, when used properly, allows only the correct things through. Something can be both true and necessary, but if it is not kind, I have no business saying it in any form or fashion.

Sadly, this is one of  my biggest battles. I must slow down long enough for my words to pass fully through or be stopped by the kind filter. I know I fail at using this third filter often. So, I am adding something to my third filter. In Exodus 4:12 God says, "Now, therefore, go, and I will be your mouth and teach you what you shall say."

When all is said and done, God is my absolute guide and if I work harder at using my Is it kind  filter with God's help I will be a better person and my life will be a better witness.

When Emotions Cause the Block

Last week, I posted a blog on the American Christian Fiction Writer's(ACFW) blog. I wanted to share it on here this week

https://www.acfw.com/blog/when-emotions-cause-the-block/

God bless you all!

I have four sons. And because I say it, most of you probably believe it. But none of you were there when I had those C-sections. The scar on my abdomen is physical proof something happened, but only my husband, my doctor and the nurses who were present each time can truly verify that, yes, those babies were delivered from my uterus.

There are four amazing young men alive, and there are birth certificates that say when they were born and that Don and I are their parents. But those birth certificates were filled out by a nurse and submitted by a nurse and someone somewhere in the courthouse signed whatever had to be signed to approve those birth certificates. A human wrote and approved those birth certificates. And yet, from the time we received them every agency that has ever required them for SS#, work permits, driver's licenses, passports, etc, etc has accepted that the information on those birth certificates is valid and true.

I imagine anyone who reads this post most likely believes it and does not question the truth of my words just because they were not present when it happened or because a fallible human created the calendar system, the years and dates and told me those days were the dates they were born.

Was I there when Jesus lived, died, was buried, and rose again? No. But thousands of people were. Hundreds of people saw him alive after He was dead. When the gospels were written many eye witnesses were still alive. Human nature has never changed. If the gospels had been lies you can bet the authors of them would have been called on it and the scrolls would never have survived.

I have four sons. And, you can choose to believe or deny that those birth certificates written and approved by fallible humans are true or not. Your choice does not change the truth. In the same way I can choose to believe the accounts of Jesus' life or not, we all can, we all will. But my choice to believe does not affect the truth of His life, His love, His sacrifice, His grace anymore than another person's choice to not believe does not.

I choose to believe Jesus Christ is my Savior. My choice. And I will stand for the truth of Jesus all of my life and even when my life ends and I actually stand before Him for real.

Amen.

My Source

I think it comes down to what your 'source' is. My source is the Bible. I follow Jesus. Jesus said he did not come to abolish the law, but to complete it. Jesus said it is not what goes into a mouth that is unclean, it is what comes out. Jesus said all food is good. I believe all humans-adult, child, infant and unborn- should be treated with respect and love. I believe animals should be treated as animals, not humans. That means not abused, but also not revered. I love all of nature. And, I thank God for providing plants, animals, and water for our nourishment.If anything I ever do appears out of sync with what I believe, and with what Jesus would have me do, I would ask you remember that I am a sinner, living in a sinful world and I mess up. I am thankful I have a Savior I can run to when I mess up, Who always welcomes me back.I am NOT perfect and never will be in this earthly life. But I follow the One who is perfect. And that is a good place to be.

Today is one of my days to be the blogger at the ACFW site. Today my blog is featured on the ACFW website. Go on over and read, comment, and stay a while and read other's posts also.

It's About Trust

Proverbs 3:5-6 is a common memory verse.

"Trust in the Lord with your whole heart, and lean not on your own understanding but in all ways acknowledge Him and he will make your paths straight."

I learned this with a cutesy little song at Vacation Bible School when I was a child. But, as an adult this verse has challenged me again and again. My choice to trust or to not trust I what determines my destiny, not chance. And, while asking Jesus to be my Savior was a once and done thing, trusting Him and committing all my life and my will to Him is a constant, ongoing, moment-by-moment thing.

It's trusting Him even when it doesn't make sense. Because when I lean on my own understanding of things I see more ugly, anger, hate, injustice, and hurt than anything else. My understanding is partial, shallow, and selfish. I don't begin to understand the things our family has recently faced—much of which is heartbreaking and surely seems futile—and I  find myself, like Solomon, seeing life as a "chasing after the wind."

But I have chosen to commit my life and my will to Him, the One who does understand . . . ALL of it . . . He understands now and forever, behind and present and beyond the present. He's the One I choose to trust. I look forward to the day I understand. But, for now, I trust and follow the path that He makes straight for me—even when it feels quite crooked